Kick Ass 2: This Is Not a Review. This is Real Life.

I really enjoyed Kick Ass 2. Not to say that it didn’t have any faults, because all movies have faults. I believe the good bits of Kick Ass 2 out way the bad bits. Chloe Grace Moretz is a gem. She gets an amazing arc, some great lines and plenty of moments to show off that she is the real deal. Whether it is delivering a line inches from Mother Russia’s Crotch, rolling around the roof of a vehicle dodging bullets or trying out for the dance squad. She excels. She is the Goku of this tale and her removed individualization drives most of the drama and action of the movie. She is 14 in the movie going through a 14 year old girl’s problems. There is a really funny sequence in the movie, which I will not spoil. I’m just wondering whether Wadlow asked to have a One Direction trailer shown before the movie specifically. One Direction doesn’t make a cameo… You will understand when you see it.

This isn’t to say that she doesn’t have help from the supporting cast. Aaron Taylor-Johnson does the same thing he did in the first Kick Ass. The bright eyed and excited adrenaline junky/moral compass. I do think it is a bit hammy and his American accent is really off, like Marty Mcfly, from other NYC accents which kind of troubles me. It’s a little too Hollywood. Oh well, maybe he will show us a little something new when he plays Quicksilver for Whedon. Having said that I think that he gets a lot of good screen time and some great moments from the team created Justice Forever. 

Jim Carrey was fantastic. He is a total chameleon and can get you to laugh whenever he wants. It is kind of ironic that he is against the violence betrayed in this movie because he plays a Born Again Christian. He does kill people, but in the name of God and people have been doing that for years…

It was very interesting to see the work of John Romita Jr. shown to us on screen, then to juxtapose those images with a live action version. This is especially when it comes to The MotherFucker’s (McLovin(Christopher Mintz-Plasse)(Who I think is not that great in this)) team of colorful baddies who get some great moments. They are very stereotypical and ‘archetypal,’ without really taking us out of the flow of the movie, thanks to the images from the comic.

Speaking of which this movie goes out of its way to remind us over and over again that this is not a comic book or a movie. THEN STOP SHOWING US IMAGES AND TEXT BOXES RIPPED FROM A COMIC BOOK. Wadlow tried very hard to let us (The viewer) know that we are not watching a sequel, that this was real life. I feel like it would be very hard to take over a franchise and make it your own even though you need people to remember the first movie. Stop telling me I’m not watching a sequel while my ticket has a ‘2’ on it.

The evolution of Hit Girl, Kick Ass and The MotherFucker is fantastic to watch.  It hits some bumps along the way, but I had a great time and cannot wait to see it again.

All in all, very enjoyable I give Kick Ass 2  7.5 blood splatters to Kick Ass 1’s 7.   

Procrastination

Hello, it has been at least seven months since we had this one sided conversation. There are a few things I need to get off my chest. I am dumb. Sometimes what seems to be the right thing to do will end up kicking your ass. And never give up.

Having said that, I think that the first draft of this script I am writing will be god aweful and I will need counceling at the conclusion of this draft. Then, I will need a draft, of bud, in my belly.

I really like ANIMALS TALKING IN ALL CAPS. That guy is funny.

I have been watching a lot of youtube videos lately and am trying to decide on a costume. Either, Sexy Sax Man, or the Grapist. Both have a lot of great potential for getting me in trouble. If you don't know what either of these are youtube it, its hilarious.

I would like to talk about my current situation in my love life, but that is personal and we don't know each other all that well.

Tootles.

I know I have been gone!

Yeah so it has been awhile since I have posted, but that is ok. I have been really busy with the Raphy Report and School that I have driven myself absolutely crazy. I will be back to posting regularly very very soon! BTW Suker Punch sucked, Hanna was OK, and Assassin's Creed Brotherhood is the shit.

Spring?

So, Spring Break!... Big events of note would include; Battle Los Angeles, That movie has some of the cheesiest monologues ever. But the action and special effects are so awesome that you do not care once those moments are over. Battle LA makes you believe there is no way they could make it, and care! The best way to summarize this flick is by smashing Black Hawk Down and Independence Day together. If you take the plots and set the 3 of them together it's mind blowing how many similarities travel between the movies.

I also viewed a bunch of other movies and tv series, but the one that I wanna talk about is Rango. Rango is a spaghetti western that cannot decide what kind of movie it wants to be. An animated spaghetti western with animals? Yeah, sounds like a silly concept for kids right? Well, that's what it markets itself as, but this movie contains so many... not even adult jokes, but the elevated language and adult humor caused my date and I to laugh more than the kids, the movies apparent target audience. The movie made me wonder, if scripts this good are being produced for movies that pander themselves to the wrong audience, what is going on with these films whose scripts are terrible.

I'm out.

Debilitation

Last week was one of my busiest weeks. I thought I was doing really well handling everything on my plate. I was going 7 am til 1 or 2 in the morning everyday. I was beginning to feel exhausted and weak on friday afternoon. I had class until 3 then I had to work from 5 til midnight at the FamVid. I reached my sales goals for the month so that was awesome, but I was a mess. I had a hard time standing up most of the time, but I had a smile on my face whenever I saw a customer. Needless to say by the end of the night I was dead. I stayed the night at Em's house and passed out immediately.

I was really ticked off the next morning cause I still felt like crap, but got up to take the kids in the Comic Culture Forum to Buffalo to go to a Comic Book shop. I got up at 830 to make sure I was there on time. 12 kids signed up and 3 showed up. I canceled the trip to the unfortunate displeasure of the three kids that showed up. Epic Fail.

The rest of the day I spent in bed playing Dragon Age 2. Saving my spiel about that game for the Raphy Report so tune in next week for my partial review! You should be checking in every week anyway.

The one issue I am going to encounter this week is dealing with people and professionalism. To me and the other producers, The Raphy Report is more important than any other job. So, we arrive early, we are kind, courteous and friendly and we respect each other. We had a violation of this last week so we will need to talk about this. This is not just any other GODDAMNNEWSSHOW. Yeah I swear, but I am still serious as shit about the Raphy Report. So you better look out or your head is gonna be gone.

Are You As Excited As I Am?

You might be, but about something different. I won't judge you, but I might. People get confusing when they are not straight forward with you, right? I do that. SEE it sucks!


Anyway, The Raphy Report has like 20 members now. It is awesome! So many crazy things are happening it is almost to much to handle, but it makes me happy. I am trying to synergize myself for my internet whoring fetish, and for the raphy report. I just signed up for tumblr, which I do not know what I am gonna do with yet. I am quite comfortable with blogger and twitter.

I also get upset about people who settle for Microsoft products. It's ok if you are writing code, but not ok if you are anyone else. The only reason I run a PC is because I am to fuckin broke to buy a MAC.

In all honesty I am using all of you to procrastinate from writing my one page paper. Yeah it's only one page. Don't judge me/you can judge me.

OHOHOHOH! You know what ticked me off today?! I said "God Damn" in a segment. The guy at the TV station told us to bleep it or mute it out. WHAT?! On Late Night Fredonia A kid is pretending to jerk himself off and another kid says god dammit when he loses a video game. How about DOUBLE FREAKIN STANDARDS! My policy is, if you do not want to hear these terms that our demographic of 18 to 24 year olds use... GET YOUR NEWS SOMEWHERE ELSE. *PRAT*

(dropped mic and walked off stage) 

Delusions of Entitlement

So, quick blog this week to get the writing juices flowing. Guess what?! Still have not heard anything about my stolen possessions. My douchebag housemate did walk into my room while I was sleeping the other night and I had to yell at him to leave, and he called me a dick. IT WAS 2 IN THE MORNING ASSHOLE! Then he comes home drunk last night gets undressed in the kitchen and bathroom leaves his clothes everywhere and then eats my left over chinese food! I was looking forward to my Hunan Chicken! This is the housemate that threw up in his room from drinking and had his mom drive from Buffalo to clean it up for him, 1 hour drive.

Here I shall harp again on my favorite subject. I do not know how this kid expects to be a teacher for grades 1-5?! How can you expect to teach someone when their maturity level is higher than yours. He has no sense of responsibility, he owes me like sixty bucks in bills which is three months worth! When he does pay me it is a check from his mom! He will not know how to take care of himself when he gets into the real world and he will be the douchy, more pathetic version of Brenden from Step-Brothers, when he fails. Which, he will.

Everyone around me has been sick lately so hopefully I don't catch anything... Haven't so far... Oscars were lame. I hate how they are directed and organized, they should revamp it... The did the montage for before the presentation of the best picture award and the montage started and ended, with a voice over of the whole sequence, from The King's Speech. Way to keep everyone in suspense the academy!

Raphy Report is going well, check it out on Youtube, Faceook, and twitter! We are going to be setting up a website this week so we will be extremely legit and building rep. People just need to live up to their responsibilities. Ok, gonna write an outline for my paper and get some sleep. Good night interweb!